You Knew What Would It Would Be Like Marrying a Farmer

I don’t know how many times I’ve heard “It’s nice you knew what you were getting to when you married a farmer.”

But did I? Did I really?

I knew that farm life meant spending many hours outside, likely going to many events alone with the kids, having to be flexible at the last moment, having cows getting out come first and the list goes on and on of what I knew being a farm family was like. That’s likely how many farm families are and what it looks like from a child’s perspective. Keyword there is child.

Which means I didn’t have bills to pay, meals to make, kids to take care of, housework to do and all the other adult responsibilities that I have now. Just think of how much weight that has on farm wives and moms or even women farmers. I didn’t have that as a kid. That was not part of my perspective when growing up on the farm.

Another piece I didn’t realize is all the feelings, thoughts, anxiety, etc. that comes with being a mom. Oh and don’t forget trying to always keep your kids fed and alive each day. What a weight that is!

Not only did I realize the physical strength it takes to me a farm wife and mom, but that emotional strength is a huge piece of it. One that many people don’t think about when it comes to being a farm family. What is the feeling when your husband calls and says “I won’t be there.” That means I have to keep track and take care of three kids all by myself – so much emotional strength right there.

Lastly, I didn’t know all the sacrifices my mom went through, which now as an adult I’m very thankful for those rose-colored glasses she put on me. But on the other hand, she made it look so easy to a small kid. Because my dad was dedicated to the farm, she wasn’t always able to go out with friends or do what she maybe wanted to do.

So did I know what I was getting to when I decided I wanted to marry a farmer and be a farm family? Nope. Not at all. But I am determined to give my kids the best farm life we have.